Thursday, January 28, 2010

The freedom of forgiveness

I had breakfast today with my new friend, Joyce, and we talked a bit about people needing to take responsibility for themselves. We live in a 'blame someone else' society and it frustrates me. Enough is enough, folks. Bad things happen to us as we're growing up. Sometimes there's abuse. Sometimes parents get divorced. Sometimes harsh words and criticisms are part of daily dinner conversations. Sometimes we're bullied. Sometimes we grow up without any security...always wondering when the other shoe is going to drop. Oftentimes, we learn that love is conditional and we spend our time doing instead of being.

If you had a rough time of it when you were growing up, I'm sorry. Children should be cherished and protected from pain. But the reality is they often are not.

Are you bitter? Are you being held back due to painful memories? Do you feel justified holding on to your anger? Too bad. There's not one thing you can do about what happened to you or your family years ago. The only thing you can do now is choose a different path.

Forgiveness, whether it's undeserved or not, brings freedom and peace. The late Dr. Richard Carlson wrote in his wonderful little book, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, "Is it more important to be right or to be happy?"

That's my challenge for you today. Get unstuck. Choose to let go of the pain, disappointment, anger, bitterness, and whatever else is eating you alive. Happiness is up to you.

"But I just can't," I hear you saying. Well, the first step is to be willing to let it go. The second step just might be to seek some professional help.

Years ago, when I found myself stuck in unforgiveness, I eventually came to the point where I prayed, "Please Lord, make me willing to forgive." That's all it took for me. As the days passed and I continued to pray, the willingness came, followed by the forgiveness.

Forgiveness sets us free! If you don't see the need to do it for yourself, please think about the effect your attitude is having on your family. Set them free, too! You're the only one with the power to do just that.

Keeping it emotionally healthy,



  1. Forgiveness and letting go are two difficult things to do. But they are necessary to move forward. I know because I have been mired in both.

  2. I'm glad you were able to move on Mary. It's challenging, but so worthwhile!


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