Monday, July 8, 2013

Feeling homesick

Marley Grace. One of the reasons I'm homesick.
It's been a week since I left Pittsburgh. I've been at my late mother's house now for seven days. Obviously, I've learned some things.
  • Sometimes, being alone is a good thing.
  • Too much of a good thing can be bad.
  • I miss my husband.
  • He misses me.
  • I am now more aware of what Mom's typical day was like... and it hurts.
  • People who live alone need people to show them they care. They need conversation. Touch. Food dropped off. Maybe even flowers. They need to know they still matter.
  • A home is not just a house. There is an embrace there that remains, even after people die.
  • I crave simplicity.
  • I despise clutter.
  • I needed, desperately needed, a break.
  • I needed to grieve.
  • I needed time alone to cry.
  • Bumps in the night scare me when I'm all alone.
  • I'm starting to feel a bit homesick.
  • Drinking wine alone is not nearly as enjoyable as drinking it with friends and family.
  • Cooking for one is a drag.
  • I'm terrified, really... terrified... of being widowed again.
  • I really want to keep this house... somehow.
  • I love being able to walk places in town (I can't do that where I live).
  • I'm enjoying being with people who I have a history with (like over 50 year history with).
  • I'm having a hard time focusing on work even without the distractions of home. I guess it's not about where I am, it's about where my mind is.
Sometimes, we all need a change of scenery to put things into perspective. My wish for you is that you can tap into that special place... for an hour... for a day... for a week, and let yourself absorb life's lessons. I believe it will make you a better parent, a better child, a better spouse, and a better friend.

Wishing you life's blessings,

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