Monday, December 17, 2012

Beyond the victims of Sandy Hook

I am a grandma. Like other grandmas, I adore my grandchildren. I prefer them when they are behaving, but continue to adore them when they are not. Love is love. It doesn't diminish due to behavior.

I imagine Adam Lanza has at least one grandparent. I can't say for sure, as Google revealed no results when I did a search. Of course, not many people are talking about this brutal killer's grandparents. 

But I am. Even though I do not know their names, I hurt for them. As I hurt for all the grandparents of the slain victims. As a mother, I identify with all those mommies with empty arms. Unfathomable. As an aunt, a cousin, a neighbor, a sister, a friend... I identify with the others. I can put myself in their place and try to imagine their pain. Of course, my imaginings are nothing close to their actual devastation. But I can empathize. 

All the emotions are overwhelming and unbearable and the list of victims goes beyond the 27... it is far reaching. So I decided to hone in on praying for a select group of people. Everyone involved in the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School needs our prayers. However, I'm focusing on the grandparents, including the grandparents of Adam Lanza. Did they ever suspect he could hurt someone? Maybe. But I'm certain that they never, ever imagined their grandson could do anything this horrendous. 

Every day, throughout the upcoming months, I am focusing my prayers on the grandparents of each victim. This morning, however, I started by praying for Adam's grandparents. Their broken hearts are my focus today. If his maternal grandparents are still alive, they have to be reeling, not only for the horrors of what their grandson did, but also for the loss of their daughter. I cannot imagine what they must be going through.

I encourage you to narrow down your prayers and focus on a certain family or a particular family member of the victims... and, if you are so inclined, include the Lanza family in your prayers. Maybe you're too angry to do that right now, but I guarantee you, that prayers soften your heart. Praying for them just might be the thing you need.

Why did God allow this horrific tragedy? I don't know. I know He could have prevented it. Just like He could have prevented the loss of innocent children's lives during the Holocaust or when the A-bomb was dropped. He could have intervened and kept my friend's daughter Katie alive, rather than letting the leukemia in her body win. He could have intervened and healed Connor, my friend's newborn nephew. Or my friend Trudi's son, Brandon. He could have prevented the miscarriages of my grandbabies. He could have. He could have.

As my husband struggled with these questions last evening in an honest talk with God, he felt a peace come over him. The answer is simply that we live in a fallen world. Evil exists. Man-made toxins poison our bodies. Diseases ravage. Illnesses steal away our loved ones. Including mental illnesses. 

Are there any real answers as to why someone would shoot precious, innocent children? No, I'm afraid not. So all I can do is pray. I hope you'll join me.


  1. what a beautiful post...I hope to (I tend to forget :() pray for the mothers...including his...since I do not know if she was a believer...and her mother...

    1. Thank you, Maggie. Today, in addition to praying for Emilie Parker's grandparents, I prayed for the morticians and those who are helping prepare the bodies for burial. This must be traumatizing to many of them.


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